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Savvy Strategies Relational Life Therapy
Nikki Loscalzo, Ed. M., RLT, & DARTT Certified Therapeutic Coach
Offering Terry Real's Relational Life Therapy, Relationship Skills Bootcamps, &
Developmental and Relational Trauma-Informed Individual & Couples Work
via convenient online sessions for clients in all locations
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"I Need to Tell You What's Wrong (with You)..."
Most of us also complain because, in the moment, complaining feels good as we vent our frustrations, anger, and disappointments. But while c
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Sep 16, 20205 min read
494 views
For the Days When Instead of "Happily Ever After" It's "I Hate Your Stupid Face"
When Terry Real (LINK) refers to this experience of “normal marital hatred,” he often quips that in the decades that he has used this phrase
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Aug 11, 20207 min read
920 views
0 comments
The Stories that we Make-Up, Why They Upset Us, and How They Mess Up Our Relationships
When it comes to our intimate relationships all of us are fiction writers. Unfortunately, most of the time we don’t realize that we’re writi
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Jul 11, 20205 min read
370 views
0 comments
When You're Afraid it Might Be Over - But You Don't Want it To Be
When your relationship is falling apart it can seem hopeless, and like nothing you do can fix the problems that have built up between you. B
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Jun 23, 20204 min read
313 views
0 comments
“Why Can’t You Just Be On My Side?”
Frequently, this disconnection stems from the listening partner’s feelings of helplessness when they can’t solve their partner’s problem - w
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Jun 10, 20204 min read
478 views
0 comments
The Bewildering Pain of Infidelity
Perhaps the emotion which is mostly commonly experienced in the wake of infidelity in a relationship is bewilderment.
The hurt partner’s
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
May 29, 20202 min read
85 views
0 comments
"Why Does My Partner Make Me Act Like This ?"
At its most basic level, emotional intimacy is the purpose of any close relationship. Emotional intimacy allows you to be vulnerable, to sha
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
May 22, 20203 min read
113 views
"How Can You Even Think That?" - What to Do As Parents When You Disagree About Social Distancing
When parents have different positions on what they consider safe and appropriate for where their kids should venture and what is safe for th
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
May 15, 20204 min read
35 views
0 comments
The Best Thing You Can Do For Yourself, Even When It All Sucks
While dealing with the stress and uncertainty of COVID-19 and the resulting economic upheaval, many of us are experiencing a great deal of t
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Apr 30, 20203 min read
31 views
0 comments
"I Need a Break. Now."
Within this environment of uncertainty, disruption, and isolation our intimate relationships are vulnerable to frequent disagreements and em
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Apr 22, 20205 min read
60 views
0 comments
If You Really Want to Tell Off Your Partner Try This Instead
When these "Losing Strategies" fail to move us into a state of repair the relationship suffers, and over time our relationships becomes less
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Apr 10, 20205 min read
107 views
0 comments
"We Need to Talk..."
These deliberate alternatives to the default responses are what Terry Real calls The Five Winning Strategies for getting what you want in
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Mar 31, 20203 min read
118 views
0 comments
A Parent's Guide to Surviving COVID-19 School Closings - You Don't Have to "Homeschool" Your Kids
In a short week and a half our lives have been dramatically altered in almost every conceivable way. Financial worries, health fears, profou
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Mar 20, 20205 min read
238 views
0 comments
“I Give Up..”
Perhaps more than any of the other Losing Strategies, withdrawal can take various forms and may arise from a wide array of motivations. Anyt
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Mar 6, 20203 min read
172 views
0 comments
What to Do After a Fight: Five Steps to Increased Intimacy and Connection
All relationships continually move through a cycle of harmony, disharmony, and repair. Most of us think that the problem lies in the disharm
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Feb 28, 20205 min read
583 views
0 comments
"I'll Make You Regret What You Did to Me"
Like the other Losing Strategies, retaliation erodes intimacy and tears us further away from our partners. At the same time, the impulse tha
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Feb 27, 20203 min read
140 views
0 comments
How You Can Make Valentine's Day More Than a Hallmark Holiday
For a relationship to not just survive, but to remain passionate and intimate over the long term one of the most important things a couple n
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Feb 14, 20203 min read
59 views
0 comments
"You Need to Get Just How Effing Pissed I Am at You Right Now!”
Of course, on some level, even our most out of control expressions of hurt and anger often remain a perverse expression of our yearning for
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Feb 11, 20203 min read
233 views
0 comments
“If Only You Would...”
the Losing Strategy of “Controlling Your Partner” doesn’t have to look anything like Mother May I Sleep with Danger in order to be destructi
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Jan 27, 20203 min read
121 views
0 comments
“If You Would Just Admit That You’re Wrong Then Everything Would be Fine”
relationship “Losing Strategy” number one, “Needing to Be Right.” So, why is this strategy a loser even when you are, in fact,
Nikki Loscalzo Ed. M.
Jan 20, 20203 min read
102 views
0 comments
You Deserve a Cherishing Relationship
The relationship you wish for is possible, but sometimes skills and tools aren’t enough to get you there. Most of us have times in our lives when we need help to rebuild the passion and connection in our relationships.
If this is where you are - reach out. I can help.
Contact me today for a twenty-minute free phone consultation or to set up an initial ninety-minute session.
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